Fat Bastard

I was once a fat bastard

but then I found God

with the help of prayer

I have a ripped bod

my stomach's a washboard

my biceps unreal

oh lord sweet Jesus

I have buns of steel!

with muscles a bulging

I flex, my Pecs a lot

midnight prayer sessions

they sure hit the spot

my workouts are a blur

sometimes things get scary

but I really shed pounds

when I do the Virgin Mary

so all you fat Atheists

it's time you got wise

be like the Catholics
go out and Exorcise!